The Truth about Leading with Vulnerability

For many leaders, the idea of showing vulnerability feels like a risk. They ask: If I admit mistakes, show doubt, or express emotion, will my team still respect me? And that's exactly what they taught be in the military.

This fear is understandable. Most of us have been conditioned to believe that authority comes from confidence, control, and having all the answers.

But is this principle outdated?

Vulnerability can be a leadership superpower

Leadership expert Brené Brown challenges this notion, arguing that vulnerability is not a liability. On the contrary, it can be a leadership superpower. When used effectively, it fosters trust, connection, and resilience. But there’s a fine line: when does vulnerability enhance leadership, and when does it undermine it?

Let’s explore how leading with vulnerability is possible without losing the respect of their teams.

The Paradox of Vulnerability in Leadership

There’s a reason why many leaders hesitate to show vulnerability.

A leader who constantly wavers, hesitates, or appears overwhelmed doesn't have a great appeal on their team.

People don’t want to follow someone who seems unsure of the path forward. I wouldn't!

At the same time, no one truly trusts a leader who pretends to be invincible.

What would you think of a person who is convinced that they are always right?

A leader who never admits mistakes or struggles can come across as detached, arrogant, or even deceptive.

So, how do we resolve this paradox? The key is in two words: Authenticity and Intention.

Being vulnerable as a leader doesn’t mean oversharing personal struggles or displaying uncertainty at every turn.

It means knowing when and how to express honesty in a way that strengthens leadership.

Let's go into more detail.

Leading with Vulnerability Without Losing Respect

1. Be Honest, But Stay Grounded

Part of leading with vulnerability is acknowledging reality while maintaining a sense of direction and confidence. This comes with self-awareness, one of the pillars of effective leadership.

• Instead of saying: "I have no idea what we’re doing."

• Say: "We’re facing uncertainty, but here’s how we’re approaching it."

Honesty earns trust, but leadership requires steadiness.

2. Admit What You Don’t Know (And Do Something About It)

Leaders don’t need to have all the answers (and if they say they know it all, they are lying). However, they do need to show they are taking action to fill the gap.

• Instead of hiding gaps in knowledge, say: "I don’t have the answer right now, but here’s how we’ll figure it out."

• Instead of dismissing mistakes, say: "Here’s what we learned, and here’s how we’ll improve."

Acknowledging uncertainty while demonstrating problem-solving and adaptability is a fantastic way to earn credibility.

3. Share Stories That Build Connection, Not Chaos

Personal stories of failure, growth, or resilience can be powerful leadership tools, but vulnerability should be shared with the intention of inspiring.

• Instead of venting frustrations, share lessons learned from past challenges.

• Use vulnerability as a tool for mentorship, helping others navigate their own struggles.

When leaders share stories in a way that strengthens their team’s mindset, vulnerability becomes a source of empowerment.

4. Be Transparent, But Set Boundaries

As we have already discussed, while vulnerability builds connection, oversharing erodes professionalism. Strong leaders understand the difference between expressing and unloading emotions onto the team or admitting struggles and making the team responsible for them.

So, a leader might say: "This has been a challenging project, and I appreciate everyone’s effort. Let’s discuss how we can adjust our approach."

What they shouldn’t say is: "I’m so overwhelmed and don’t know how to handle this situation."

In other words, vulnerability should invite collaboration, not place emotional burdens or pressure on the team.

5. Show Humanity Without Losing Direction

Ultimately, people want to follow leaders who are genuine, relatable, and strong enough to navigate challenges.

• A leader who is too rigid can create distance.

• A leader who is too open can create uncertainty.

• A leader who is honest yet intentional creates trust and motivation.

As Brené Brown puts it:

“Vulnerability is not winning or losing; it’s having the courage to show up when you can’t control the outcome.”

You can "use" your humanity to inspire, connect, and lead with authenticity.

A Final Thought: Redefining Strength in Leadership

The thesis behind this article is that vulnerability, when wielded with intention, is leadership at its best.

We are humans, and, as such, we have flaws. Trying to hide them and pretend to be infallible has the only effect of creating distance between us and our team.

So, where do you stand? Do you see vulnerability as a leadership asset or a risk?

Let’s start the conversation. Drop a comment or reach out.

#Leadership #Authenticity #Vulnerability #Trust #EmotionalIntelligence